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[Vengeance]

I'm pathetic. I read that and edited it in my head the entire time. *sigh*

[elmono311]

WASHINGTON: Transportation Security Administration officials reported today Santa Claus will have to obey all air travel regulations of the United States. This means the moment Claus enters US airspace, he will have to land at the nearest airport and be subjected to the same pat downs and strip searches as the rest of the holiday travelers have to go through.

When reached for comment, Claus said, grabbing his crotch, "If anybody touches this present, Santa Claus will have to smack a bitch."